THOU = “YOU” WHEN YOU’RE FUCKING DOING SOMETHING.
THEE = “YOU” WHEN YOU’RE HAVING SOMETHING FUCKING DONE TO YOU.
THY = “YOUR” AND “YOURS” WHEN THE THING YOU OWN BEGINS WITH A FUCKING CONSONANT.
THINE = “YOUR” AND “YOURS” WHEN THE THING YOU OWN BEGINS WITH A FUCKING VOWEL.
IF YOU’RE GOING TO MAKE SHITTY OLD ENGLISH TEXT POSTS, DO IT RIGHT.
what they don’t tell you about belatedly realizing you are Something Other Than Straight is the sheer amount of time you will spend facepalming at yourself
like yes there is a lot of angst and panic and confusion but there is also
pure unadulterated facepalm
because your past self suddenly appears as dense as the person in a horror movie who suggests everyone split up